Let’s talk pronouns: gender-specific and gender-neutral

June is Pride Month! Nandi Young, Georgian’s Coordinator for Education and Resource Development, Centre for Equity, Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging, talks here about pronouns.

Personal pronouns are words that refer to folks without using their name, such as he, she or they. They are an important part of our identities.

Gender-specific pronouns are how many folks refer to each other in the third person (he/his and she/her). Folks may change their pronouns to align with their gender identity.

Gender-neutral or gender-inclusive pronouns, such as they, them and their, and ze (ZEE), sie (SEE), zie (ZEE) and hir (HEAR), are pronouns that don’t associate a gender with an individual.

Folks don’t always use the pronouns that you might expect based on your assumptions about their name or appearance.

Using someone’s correct pronouns:

validates their identity
signals that you’re a supportive ally
communicates that they belong

When someone is referred to with the wrong pronouns, it can make them feel disrespected, invalidated, dismissed, and/or alienated.

It’s good practice to use gender-inclusive pronouns such as “they” until you know what someone’s pronouns are.

Unsure of someone’s pronouns? Pay attention to others who refer to this person. If you’re still unsure, or worried that folks may be using the wrong pronouns, you can politely and privately ask that person what their pronouns are.

You can also get the conversation started yourself by introducing yourself and sharing your pronouns first; in a large group, you can ask that everyone introduce themselves and state their pronouns. This is a great way to normalize the practice and create more inclusive spaces.

Pronouns stickers

Want to let folks know what your pronouns are? Pick up your pronouns stickers in the Barrie GCSA office (Room A163). Not on the Barrie Campus? Email GCSA Barrie to find out how to get a pronouns sticker!

It’s important to note that some folks don’t use pronouns at all, in which case you can refer to them by their name only.

Pronouns FAQs

What are some common personal pronouns?

Pronoun	Nominative (subject)	Objective (object)	Possessive determiner	Possessive pronoun	Reflexive
She	She laughed	I called her	Her eyes gleam	That’s hers	She likes herself
He	He laughed	I called him	His eyes gleam	That’s his	He likes himself
They	They laughed	I called them	Their eyes gleam	That’s theirs	They like themselves
Ze	Ze laughed	I called hir/zir	Hir/zir eyes gleam	That’s hirs/zirs	Ze likes hirself/zirself

How should I ask someone what pronouns they use?

You can simply ask! It’s as easy as:

Nice to meet you. My pronouns are she/her. What are yours?
By the way, I meant to ask, what are your pronouns?
What’s your name and pronouns?

It’s OK to feel uncomfortable asking about pronouns. It can sometimes feel awkward, but asking is the only way you can know for sure; and, asking is always better than assuming.

If asking outright feels strange, try sharing your own name and pronouns first:

Hi, I’m Hayden. I use he/him pronouns. What about you?

Starting the conversation and sharing your own name and pronouns establishes a space of safety for everyone around you.

What if I get someone’s pronouns wrong?

Apologize briefly, correct yourself, and move on. Most importantly, practise so you get it right the next time. There’s no need to be overly apologetic. Folks understand that mistakes happen. What’s important is showing that you’re trying to use someone’s correct pronouns.

Check out this resource for more information on how you can respond (and not respond) when you accidentally misgender someone.

Why should I add pronouns to my email signature?

You can add pronouns to your email signature on Teams and in other programs.

What about gendered greetings and salutations?

It’s important that we write inclusively also. Gendered terms, like Mr. and Mrs., can be replaced by more inclusive options when the gender of the person you’re contacting is unknown, or if the person uses gender-neutral pronouns.

Gendered greetings and salutations

Honorific	Pronunciation	Meaning
Div./Ind.	Pronounced as they appear in “individual”	Short for “individual” (example: Div. Chen, Ind. Thompson)
M.	Pronounced as “em”, like the letter M	Shorthand of Mr., Mrs., without signaling gender
Mir.	Pronounced like “mer” in summer	Blend of honorifics: miss/mister and sir/madam (example: Mir. Tyson)
Mx.	There are many ways to pronounce this honorific. Many folks use “mix” or “meh-ks” or simply “em ex”	The x acts as gender-neutral alternative to other letters indicating gender (example: Mx. Ayad)